Chapter 16
Been back home reminds me of the old times, the sadness, happiness, roller-coaster moods, the family drama, the me I used to be (unbreakable)
Mom and the rest of my siblings welcomed me and it was so nice seeing them all looking happy and I'm glad that things are going right for them. I've been here for a couple of days and I still feel this empty void inside me that I can't seem to feel up, my sisters tried to cheer me up and even though they don't know my story they have my back no matter what ,i could tell them what's bothering me but the hardest part about telling a story is the beginning, where do I begin? Will it make sense to them if I told them? I've been contemplating over and over just trying to figure out what to do and yet haven't come to any decision. Days have passed, weeks have come and gone and not a single phone call from David, I guess he really meant it when he said we should end everything between us.
How do you forget someone who meant the world to you overnight? You don't just switch off your feelings right away and if I could I would have done it a long time ago. My sisters got tired of me sitting by the window side waiting for rain in summer, I know he wasn't going to call me but the stupid side of me kept on waiting for wasted hopes.
"I don't know what happened between you and him but if you can't open up, the least you can do is let us help you" Adrianne said as she touched my shoulder and when I turned to look at her I could see the hurt in her eyes.
Alexa then held my hand and said "come with us, let's go out and hopefully this night will make a difference, it's not worth crying over a man who would hurt your feelings over and over,"
As my sisters spoke these words all the memories I had with David started playing back and forth from the time we met, how we connected so well, how I trusted him and let him see the side of me that I never let anyone see, his breath on my neck, his tender lips all over me, his beautiful eyes that made me stammer and quiver each time they locked into mine, his hands that traced each curve of my body, how do I let all of that go away, my worst nightmare of having a broken heart came true. I felt so powerless and fell on Alexa's laps as I let out a loud cry, I felt like a child that couldn't do anything about a situation but cry as much as I could. I've never cried in a long time and letting out my emotions in front of my sisters especially over a man only made me feel so weak and defeated. They both embraced me so tight and for the first time in a while I felt protected from the big lonely painful harsh reality.
*is she walking down the aisle with the church bells ringing and everyone's smiling and clapping for the newly weds? *I thought to myself
*that could have been me walking down the aisle hand in hand with him but it's not, he didn't pick me, I was his second choice, am I not pretty enough? Am I not hard working, am I not..... *
"shh" Adrienne shooshed me then continued, "you are the most beautiful person I've seen, take a look around, you dared to do what non of us could do, you went to a place thousands and thousands of miles away from home just to be independent and find meaning to your life, you're so driven and you're not afraid to take risks, the best thing you ever did was to love someone unconditionally despite the consequences, instead of walking away from it with regrets think of it as something that made you stronger, smarter, wiser and better than you were before "
Alexa then continued," he didn't see and appreciate your worth and that's his loss, you're an amazing wonderful woman and only a true man can see that and appreciate you. So what if he broke your heart, I bet there's somebody out there waiting for you. C'mon shake that sadness off and let's go out and have some fun "
Alexa is one hell of a party person and each time she's going through a tough time she runs to the only thing that can make her pain go away (at least for a while) and later on come up with new ideas to get rid of the pain permanently.
Mom and the rest of my siblings welcomed me and it was so nice seeing them all looking happy and I'm glad that things are going right for them. I've been here for a couple of days and I still feel this empty void inside me that I can't seem to feel up, my sisters tried to cheer me up and even though they don't know my story they have my back no matter what ,i could tell them what's bothering me but the hardest part about telling a story is the beginning, where do I begin? Will it make sense to them if I told them? I've been contemplating over and over just trying to figure out what to do and yet haven't come to any decision. Days have passed, weeks have come and gone and not a single phone call from David, I guess he really meant it when he said we should end everything between us.
How do you forget someone who meant the world to you overnight? You don't just switch off your feelings right away and if I could I would have done it a long time ago. My sisters got tired of me sitting by the window side waiting for rain in summer, I know he wasn't going to call me but the stupid side of me kept on waiting for wasted hopes.
"I don't know what happened between you and him but if you can't open up, the least you can do is let us help you" Adrianne said as she touched my shoulder and when I turned to look at her I could see the hurt in her eyes.
Alexa then held my hand and said "come with us, let's go out and hopefully this night will make a difference, it's not worth crying over a man who would hurt your feelings over and over,"
As my sisters spoke these words all the memories I had with David started playing back and forth from the time we met, how we connected so well, how I trusted him and let him see the side of me that I never let anyone see, his breath on my neck, his tender lips all over me, his beautiful eyes that made me stammer and quiver each time they locked into mine, his hands that traced each curve of my body, how do I let all of that go away, my worst nightmare of having a broken heart came true. I felt so powerless and fell on Alexa's laps as I let out a loud cry, I felt like a child that couldn't do anything about a situation but cry as much as I could. I've never cried in a long time and letting out my emotions in front of my sisters especially over a man only made me feel so weak and defeated. They both embraced me so tight and for the first time in a while I felt protected from the big lonely painful harsh reality.
*is she walking down the aisle with the church bells ringing and everyone's smiling and clapping for the newly weds? *I thought to myself
*that could have been me walking down the aisle hand in hand with him but it's not, he didn't pick me, I was his second choice, am I not pretty enough? Am I not hard working, am I not..... *
"shh" Adrienne shooshed me then continued, "you are the most beautiful person I've seen, take a look around, you dared to do what non of us could do, you went to a place thousands and thousands of miles away from home just to be independent and find meaning to your life, you're so driven and you're not afraid to take risks, the best thing you ever did was to love someone unconditionally despite the consequences, instead of walking away from it with regrets think of it as something that made you stronger, smarter, wiser and better than you were before "
Alexa then continued," he didn't see and appreciate your worth and that's his loss, you're an amazing wonderful woman and only a true man can see that and appreciate you. So what if he broke your heart, I bet there's somebody out there waiting for you. C'mon shake that sadness off and let's go out and have some fun "
Alexa is one hell of a party person and each time she's going through a tough time she runs to the only thing that can make her pain go away (at least for a while) and later on come up with new ideas to get rid of the pain permanently.
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