You...I don't know when I stopped but i did stopped.. Writing about you.. Writing to you.. Writing for you... You woke that part of me four years ago.. It never fell asleep ever since.. Nor have I.. What sort of creature are you.. You awoke the kid,the teen,the adult.. You awoke the broken,restless, terrified.. You awoke the childish,crazy,fun.. You awoke the driven,loyal,passionate.. So much were dormant until you came around.. I had a plan but you gave me purpose.. I waited those Thursdays like believers would wait for Sundays to attend church, Fridays to attend mosque.. Even today I'm still waiting.. For what exactly, I don't know.. To be worshiped is scary.. What if you err.. What if you have flaws.. What if I don't like the part I didn't get to know... But what if I love you even more.. Did blocking me really erased me.. Did ignoring me.. Did pretending not to see me.. Are you convinced you don't care about me.. I am not...
Connection never lies...Who was I for you to let me in... Why did you... Those walls were impenetrable for the likes of me.. Who was I when you took my name when playing cards.. How was my name mentioned in your house if I was a nobody.. I learned to play cards because of you.. So many learned after me thanks to you.. "I have three cats at home seems I have another one here" said you.. I was a strayed... I am.. Flirtatious was your quality don't regret it.. I am just a hopeless lover wanting to be loved by you.. Maybe I will never know who I was for you.. Unaware you were but both your gaze and actions never matched your words.. Ignore it.. Fight it.. Push back.. Connection once created don't get severed... Connected we still are...
Kept alive...It's not about being stuck in the past... It's about cherishing what was and what will never be... It's about those feelings felt at those very moments.. Feelings one can't get back to... The beauty of unrequited love is that i get to keep those feelings alive inside... Never fading, never forgotten.. What never was for you.. Was everything to me... Every smile,every tears shed,every laughter,every anger were deeply felt.. Every bits and pieces of you are kept alive... Your name is forever written.. In my heart, my soul, my mind and on my body...