The wind danced with your hair. The barren landscape seemed endless. Fields, golden expanses of wheat thorns. There was only the road you went through to break nature. The only gray and material object. Had the engine noise not been, a deep silence would have ruled undisturbed. If you see the world like that, nobody would have thought of an apocalypse. It was a place that was untouched. An ordinary part of the landscape. You had already met people who believed in the help of the government and scientific centers. But no one had found a solution. Even the army had surrendered in rescue operations. In fact, only abandoned camps remained. Being able to sit on the leather seat reminded you of various memories of the past, of memories that you still couldn't let go. Involuntarily you tightened your grip and thought of the days you spent with your family...

"The hell yer doin'?", Daryl mumbled, watching you out of the corner of his eye.

"Nothing."

He snorted and concentrated back on the road and you felt your cheeks burn. Who knows what kind of idiotic view he has of you? From that point on, you didn't move closer to his back. Unfortunately, the only rides on a motorcycle were the ones you shared with your dad. He loved driving to the mountains and riding dirt roads. The few times he was home, he always tried to spend a lot of time with you. As a kid, you were glad to be able to hug him like that for hours. You didn't realize that you hugged Daryl too hard, so you tried to think of something else. Rick had ordered you to procure new supplies of food after seeing a shop nearby. You still didn't recognize the reason, but Daryl was quite grumpy, and that made you very nervous. As soon as you saw the building, you were glad that you could stay away from him as much as possible. You entered the supermarket, confident to find a good loot. You closed the door behind you and before plundering the place, you decided to do an inspection to free it from some living dead. You heard some guttural sounds in the distance, otherwise everything seemed to be calm. With a careful step you entered two different corridors, but parallel to each other. From one shelf to the other, you could see Daryl very well, who was busy killing some Walkers. He was hunting. In the alcohol department, however, a Walker remained unnoticed. Daryl didn't see him. Since this time Rick had given you a compound-bow from the arsenal and believed in your accuracy of shooting. You pulled out an arrow and aimed carefully. It pierced the victim completely, but another arrow pierced his head. The Walker fell to the floor between a few bottles of wine.

"That's mine.", said the archer, retrieving his own arrow. He spat on the ground and resumed the hunt. You picked up your arrow too and followed him. You killed the other Walkers without batting an eyelash and now the killing had become a common, normal action. It no longer had any effect or emotion. On the contrary, it was almost boring and annoying. When the area was safe you ​​took a few bags and went shopping. Maggie and Glenn were on the other side in another small shop to get the last remaining cans. Of course, you would have taken only the bare necessities to fill the available bags. The next day, Michonne and Carl would go by car so they could get more. You saw Daryl with one arm in the middle of the shelf and throw the various cans on the bottom of the bag and some others to the ground.

"What the hell are you doing?", you asked: "You're too loud!"

He turned around, looked at you grimly and continued his activity. What an asshole... You took your bag, walked away and your way led you to the baby section. Judith needed milk powder and maybe you would find another useful item. In fact, you noticed some pacifiers and blankets in different colors. You even found a few diapers. After all, much better than a few dirty rags. Then you went to the hygiene department and filled the backpack with towels. After the shopping, you searched for Daryl. You just had to follow the various products that were lying on the floor. He checked a couple of bottles of alcohol and those who didn't seem to be good enough for him eventually broke a wall.

"Can you stop that shit, you've got a full bag, so let's go."

"Shut up.", he growled, not taking his eyes off the bottles. So you waited outside the supermarket for him and were angry. You decided to get involved with the few Walkers who were walking around among the houses. So you took a few arrows and practiced better aiming and centering. When you recovered from your anger, you stood near the market, waiting for the asshole to finally set off. He came out, leaned against the wall of the building and slid along it until he put his ass on the ground. He opened a bottle and sipped it.

"Now you want to drink too?", you asked annoyed.

"Fuck off.", he grunted.

You rarely lost patience, but Daryl had been bad at everyone for days. So you grabbed a big stone and threw it firmly on the back of the bottle. This broke and the contents of the bottle spread on the chest of the archer. Angrily he got up and joined you threateningly.

"The hell ya' want from me? I told ya' to fuck off!", he screamed into your face and his icy eyes just made you even more angry.

"At least you didn't look like an asshole when I met you.", you answered firmly.

"Ya' don't know shit 'bout me!", he grinned. You honestly wanted him to get angry and let go of all his hatred. You wanted him to tell the truth, which had disturbed him so much in the last few days...

"You can't stand anyone anymore, what's wrong with you, why are you acting like you're not worried about them?"

"'Cause it ain't important to me, I'm tired of their hope 'nd tired of ya' too!"

He wasn't a good liar. He was very interested in the group, but perhaps it had wronged him, probably without realizing it, because no one had the slightest idea what was going on in his head.

"You know that's not true, you love these people, you're one of them, I just have to see how you look at Rick, almost like a brother."

Damn, you thought. Merle. Merle was the problem. When Daryl heard that word, he quickly grabbed your throat. As a result, you lightly pressed the tip of a knife against his stomach to warn him.

"I've a brother 'nd Rick doesn't care, he's been gone for days 'nd this asshole won't allow me to search for him with the excuse that I serve him! Ya' know, if the Governor attacks...", he yelled. He removed his grip and dropped his arm to his sides, you did the same and moved the knife away. Then he bent his head and stared at the street. Finally he had said it, he had released the hate and let go of the anger he had in him. But the conversation continued on Daryl's side: "It's all bullshit, the truth is, nobody cares 'bout Merle, they don't care what happened to him, they take it for granted that he's back with this bastard."

This man was worried about his brother and you knew what fate he had had, but you couldn't tell him... You understood why the group wasn't particularly interested, in short, Merle was no saint and he was it who brought Maggie and Glenn to the Governor. You don't think anybody forgave him...

"If that's the case, why didn't you just look for him?"

He didn't answer you. Maybe it was hard for him to disobey Rick. You didn't know why, but he had a high regard for the sheriff and probably knew in his heart that Merle had actually gone to Woodbury. It was normal for him to suffer, but as far as you could tell, Daryl was always grumpy and moody. Probably the group had come to terms with his position... You went back into the store and came out with another bottle of the same alcohol, but Daryl shook his head. So you sat down, drank it yourself, offered it to him again and this time he nodded. You stood in silence for ten minutes, watching the destroyed neighborhood of this ruined town. He didn't apologize for the tone of his voice and the behavior he had, but he spoke to you with his eyes.

"Daryl, if Rick lets me out tomorrow, I could do an inspection in the area, maybe it'll be useless, but if it helps you then I'll do it."

You were waiting for his answer. The silence fell on you, heavier than before. But you did not complain, you were already happy that he told you his problem. You were hoping he would support your suggestion because it would also be a good excuse to return to Woodbury. You would leave at dawn and you would have to return before it got dark. As a priority, you had to change the thoughts of the Governor, hoping to find him in a good mood. You knew what you would risk, but you had to try anyway. They deserve a chance. However, you had no opinion on Michonne yet...

"He's easy to spot, has a blade instead of a hand...", he mumbled. And you took these words as a yes.

~

The darkness lustfully controlled your bodies and the surrounding nature. Even though you were not at Woodbury, you felt safe within those fences. A few days had passed and now you hoped you could see Woodbury again. You hadn't talked to Rick yet because you were busy all day, but now you were all sitting outside by the campfire. Beth sang sweet melodies that allowed each of you to lose yourselves in the swirl of your minds. Her cute voice shook you and encouraged you to reminisce. Daryl lay there with his head up. He scanned the sky above you with its sparkling stars. You wondered what he was thinking... Then you looked at Hershel. The eyes of a loving father. He looked at his two daughters and smiled contentedly. Despite everything, he was glad to still have them with him. Glenn clutched the hand of his big love Maggie, hoping he would never lose her, while Carl leafed through comics. You still couldn't say that you didn't feel like a stranger in their presence, but you didn't mind being with this group. Michonne as well, also for her these people were new friends. Except that she had nothing to hide, unlike you. You were an enemy... Carol now looked at the archer sadly. She suffered just as much as he did. Rick, with one hand, his arm resting on his knee, stroked thoughtfully through his beard. When the song ended, everyone exchanged a smile. Hershel got up and you all emulated him because it was time to go to bed. Beth approached slowly and whispered something in your ear.

"Thank you.", she said, and everyone went to their cells except Rick, who was still sitting in the grass. You walked up to him, hoping the sheriff would talk to you.

"Thank you for thinking about Judith, too.", he said quietly, while you were smiling at him, meaning to say that there was no need to thank you, and he continued: "I wonder sometimes when I go around, thinking about this war, whether the Governor does the same. How long will we have to wait? I mean, I'm not worried about my life, but I'm afraid someone will definitely get hurt or die. This war is useless... But basically it's understandable because we killed some of his men. I would act the same... Only I can't stand this waiting."

"Do you think there is a possibility of surrender?"

He frowned: "No, this man has too much pride, there would never be an agreement, he will not be satisfied until he has eradicated us all."

"You know him well, right?", you asked.

"I've only seen him twice so far."

"And that was enough for you to understand him?", you asked again.

"Yes, I could see it."

With that, you understood why he was so certain of a battle. As much as Philip was a madman in their eyes, Rick knew he would do the same in his place. For example, if someone had killed Carl or Glenn, he would have slaughtered them. From what he told you the first day, if you had injured someone, he would have killed you immediately. He would do anything to keep his group intact. He had decided to arm himself instead of running away, but you didn't know if it was the right decision... You had to tell him about your way to Woodbury, find a credible excuse, but you preferred something simple, something clear and uncomplicated to say, without which he would have to worry. Now that he was in a reflexive state, not too worried and nervous, it would have been the right moment, besides, he seemed tired, so he probably wouldn't have argued too long. You waited a bit before you finished the flow of his thoughts.

"Rick, listen... Tomorrow morning I'll go out and get back before sunset, I want to be alone for a bit."

He rubbed his neck annoyed: "You don't ask me for permission?", he replied.

"No, but I tell you."

You got up, went to the cells and let him return to his thoughts. You were sorry that you couldn't help him. You too had your crises and you didn't have the slightest idea how to get away. You hated the situation in which you had driven yourself. If you had done it, as Philip had suggested, you would all have killed in cold blood. But now you had grown fond of these people, you knew them... How could you kill them without telling them? The guilt would have devoured you. When you opened the door, you saw a small flame in the corner of the building, which immediately disappeared leaving room for a red dot. A cigarette. Surprised by the curiosity of finding out who the smoker was, you reached the weak heat source. You weren't really surprised to find Daryl.

"What did he tell ya'?", he asked ambitiously.

"I didn't ask for permission."

He laughed: "What really drives ya' out? I ain't an idiot. Ya' don't do it for my brother."

"I have to go and do something... Since I'm on the road, I take advantage of it."

He didn't ask you what you wanted to do and he knew very well that you wouldn't give him an answer. But he still gave you a cigarette.

"Do ya' want?"

You have accepted. He tried to light the lighter but it was already empty. He mumbled something and busied himself with it... You pulled the zipper on your leather jacket and pulled out the zippo you had stolen from the corpse in the tent. Daryl suddenly grabbed it and surprised you. He turned it between his fingers, searching for a moonbeam that would allow him to see the various cuts on its surface.

"What's written on it?", he asked.

"FUCK YOU."

He looked at you in amusement and studied you behind the brown strands that covered part of his face. This man did something to you and you didn't know if it was because of his particular looks or simply because of his nature. Tired of waiting, you took it with a quick movement from his hand. It still contained gas. You took a deep breath and let the smoke find its way into your lungs. Daryl looked at you silently. After all, he wasn't angry anymore...